You Can’t Please All Of The People All Of The Time

“You can’t please all the people all the time!

But you can easily piss them off”

I am at a stage in life now when it is the next generation who are getting married and having children.

As an observer of the preparations I can see the joy and delight of creating a wonderful event turn into a debacle of who to please and who to let down.

The need to please parents and the desire to be inclusive. Often one of tow things can happen.

1. The budget is blown out of the water and the event becomes a financial albatross

2. The budget is maintained and people are offended by not being invited. In some case lifelong friendships or fragile family ties are broken and lost forever.

When we launched our book we had to change the date of the launch party and subsequently created disappointment for some of our really valued friends.

This decision didn’t come lightly and we had to remind ourselves of our own rule and proceed knowing that our intention was positive and that for the one or two people we would be disappointing there would be many more who would be pleased with the date change.

I have brought all my children up to respect and remember the contribution extended family and friends have made in their lives and that yes, duty visits are expected from them.

I have also taught them that “you can’t please all of the people all of the time” and sometimes you need to set your boundaries and maintain them.

And for the occasions when I am the non-invited I have learnt that when I focus on what is best for the person who is leading a task, event or project and park my own needs and sense of disappointment.

I can be more helpful to them and enrich my relationship with them knowing I am being loving and supportive towards them.

Jenny x