Would I Rather Be Right Than Happy?
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Jenny Copeland, Drive-Thru Success
16th October 2018
Would I rather be right than happy? Particularly when right means unhappiness.
I think this is one of the hardest habits to cultivate for most people, certainly for me. I was brought up to be extremely self-reliant and at times being right was the difference between a good hiding and sore bottom or a quiet life.
In school we are conditioned to “get it right” and only rewarded when we do.
Lightbulb moment for me: I now publicly apologise to my three children who I can now see why they are hard wired to being right.
It is this need to prove our rightness that leads to our self-righteousness and we may be experienced as superior or uninterested in other people views. In “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” Stephen Covey talks about private victories preceding public victories.
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It is through this philosophy and practice that I endeavour daily to conduct my own inner wars of thoughts versus truths, versus desired outcomes, versus end games..
Ultimately, if the end game is happiness then I am often willing to settle my internal battle and allow happiness to victor over being right.
This usually translates to actions that are fuelled by love and lead to harmony. I do however maintain my boundaries. I am by no means a doormat and I am certainly nobody’s fool.
I have simply learnt through a lifetime of wars and battles that in the end there are no winners only losers and therefore I now choose happiness as my goal every time.
Jenny x
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